How do you want to feel in your relationship?
Safe? Warm? Respected? Understood? Cherished?
Whatever it is for YOU…. if you’re trying hard to make things better – you’re not alone.
We’re all pretty good about attending to our children, homes and careers. Yet when it comes to our primary relationship, most of us wing it and hope for the best. STOP!
What YOU want for your relationship is more important today than ever before.
It’s time to dig deep and think about the ONE thing that’s likely to make everything better.
You know what I’m talking about….connection.
It creates the kind of closeness you experience when you have important conversations…. without slipping into that dreaded negative spin.
Connection is a must-have for 21st century relationships and exactly what you’ll experience in our couples workshops.
Hold Me Tight® Workshop for Couples
2 Days – 7 Conversations
Join us on September 28 and 29!
Somehow, we got the message that love is mystical and magical. That it appears, then disappears. Motivates us. Confuses us. And, of course, we have no control over it.
Over the past 10 years or so we’ve learned a lot about love. Brain science has completely changed our understanding of what’s possible when it comes to shaping a loving relationship.
So much so that our whole culture is shifting and personal expectations are growing. Have you noticed? While we used to settle for good enough, today we want connection.
We want to be cherished, accepted, respected and understood. We want more from our partners and while it doesn’t have to be perfect… we believe we deserve better.
I’m thrilled to announce that Early Bird Registration (big savings!) is open for our 2019 Hold Me Tight® Workshops here in Charlotte, NC.
We have four 2-day weekends to choose from!
Yep. I’m that excited.
Most of us value our primary relationship and truly want to make it better – we read books and spend hours scouring the internet wondering how to make that special connection happen.
We carefully and regularly attend to our…
- mortgages and
- home improvement projects
with LOTS of success.
But if you work your tail off and can’t figure out why things aren’t getting better between you and your partner — you are not alone.
(HINT: this is not something we’re taught in school. And people rarely recognize emotional closeness as a skill worth building and cultivating. Turns out, it’s as essential as oxygen!)
Make no mistake – the ability for a couple to have enough closeness and trust to have an important conversation (or any conversation for that matter!) without slipping into a negative spin – is a must-have for 21st century relationships.
And that’s exactly what you’ll learn in our Hold Me Tight® Workshop for Couples.
After 2 days and 7 conversations, you’ll walk away with concrete ways to communicate and pull your partner closer.
Talking, listening and being heard for the first time in a loooooong time is exactly what you’ll experience.
Have you ever wondered what it means when someone says, ‘We’re drifting apart.’?
It means, “We’re loosing our connection and we don’t know how to find our way back to each other.”
Maybe you can relate. And maybe you’ve been wanting to have heart-to-heart conversations with your partner. But you come off your daily routine physically, mentally and emotionally exhausted so you put it off until the weekend.
Then during your ‘down-time’, when things are going well, the last thing you want to do is upset everyone (including yourself) by having a well-intentioned conversation spin out of control.
In your heart, you know how vital good communication is. It’s the most important skill you can learn when it comes to marriage and relationship success. It’s also the #1 presenting issue when most couples seek help for their relationship.
You can dance around things for a while. Eventually, you’re going to have to talk about the important stuff if you want closeness.
If you don’t know how to have important conversations without spinning into a negative cycle, then it’s impossible to have much security or stability in your relationship.
On the other hand, if you know how to have these conversations or you’re willing to learn, YOU can get to the heart of the matter quickly.
No matter who you are or how long you’ve been together, if you want to improve your relationship and grow closer, you must have CONVERSATIONS that get to the heart of the matter.
That’s why Wellness Counseling Center is excited to provide the most effective relationship information I know of ….all wrapped up in 2 Days and 7 Conversations.
Hold Me Tight® Couples Workshop – June 23 & 24, 2018
7 Conversations For You and Your Partner
Charlotte, North Carolina
Get the details: http://TheWellnessCounselingCenter.com/hmt
What’s an extraordinary relationship worth?
It’s worth a lot to some people but what is it worth to you?
We know the definition of the word love and we all have an idea of what a relationship ‘should’ be.
We also know what normal looks like. It’s what happens when two people get together, do things and make a pledge.
But connection is rare. It’s when we show up whole, experience the harmony of opposites and surprise ourselves in unexpected ways. It’s an experience beyond normal.
Connection isn’t loud. It creates a kind of tension that buzzes. It’s disruptive and calming at the same time. It unnerves us and feels scary as it breaks through the status quo. It’s full of power, yet has nothing to do with power-over. It changes both people; the giver and the recipient.
Before we can even begin to evaluate the worth of a good relationship, it’s important to understand what’s at stake.
The answers aren’t always clear in the near term.
But we’ve learned a few things over time.
If you want to know how valuable a good relationship is, the Harvard Study is a great resource.
It started in 1938, is still going on, included only men (Harvard wasn’t coed at the time) and now includes wives, children and grandchildren.
- Close relationships keep us happy over time; significantly more so than money or fame.
- Relationships and how happy we are in them has a powerful effect on our health.
- Loneliness kills and is as dangerous to our health as smoking and alcoholism.
Partnership is reciprocal. It’s a two way street. You talk, play, listen and engage with a partner.
Control is another matter. You are either under someone’s control or you apply control over them.
We live in a culture that endorses freedom, and at the same time, teaches people to seek out and admire the powerful. We reward powerful teachers, coaches, CEOs, celebrities and authority figures who tell us what to do. Not always consciously. It’s just the way it is. Familiar and easy.
Until it seeps into our intimate relationships and we find ourselves over or under. But not with. Blaming. Accusing. Defending. Insisting. Do it this way. Not that way. How could you? Why would you? You should…… You shouldn’t……
All long-term relationships have challenges and every now and then things can approach a tipping point. That’s a red flag – it’s time to reflect, take action and turn things right side up again.
People rarely want to leave their relationship. Most people want to figure things out. They want to make things better.
People ask; Is this possible? Can this / will this work? And mostly, the answer is YES!
When you’re looking for professional help it’s important to be an informed consumer. Approach the decision together; thoughtfully and collaboratively.
Here are three simple steps to guide you through the process of making a choice that is good for you AND good for your relationship:
Happy couples aren’t perfect the way you might imagine. They fuss and disagree just like everyone else. What’s unique about these couples is that partners are able to step out of negative situations fairly quickly and they do it together. They don’t brood, attack or stonewall each other.
Partners are available and engaged in affirming ways. If there’s a misunderstanding or hurt feelings, they tend to the hurt rather than blame or defend. Partners are able to reach out, connect and repair even when things are difficult.
These aren’t sweeping gestures. They’re tiny, courageous acts of love that have huge impact and bring lovers close.