couples therapy
We Got The Wrong Message!
Somehow, we got the message that love is mystical and magical. That it appears, then disappears. Motivates us. Confuses us. And, of course, we have no control over it.
Not true!
Over the past 10 years or so we’ve learned a lot about love. Brain science has completely changed our understanding of what’s possible when it comes to shaping a loving relationship.
So much so that our whole culture is shifting and personal expectations are growing. Have you noticed? While we used to settle for good enough, today we want connection.
We want to be cherished, accepted, respected and understood. We want more from our partners and while it doesn’t have to be perfect… we believe we deserve better.
What Are You Creating?
For as long as I can remember, most people I know fell in love and started creating the wedding. Who and how many to invite? Find the right venue. Live music or DJ? What kind of food and when do we taste the cake? Get these questions answered then swing into action.
The profits around organizing and implementing weddings are huge. It’s an industry that’s not going away. Just a quick Google search reveals there are more than 2.5 million weddings in the US annually valued at well over $50 billion. Yes. Billion.
Today, there’s a new kind of creating going on.
Over time, it’s likely to have more dominance and prestige because you cannot buy or duplicate it: Creating an intimate partnership that works.
How do we create an intimate partnership where we are doing great things AND still accessible, responsive and emotionally engaged with each other?
How do we show up in relationship in ways that serve our partner AND the world?
Happy couples of the future, the ones that want to be close 20 years from now, are asking these questions. If you’re aspiring to a happy 20+ year marriage, consider organizing an intimate partnership.
If you’re planning an average life by working harder, longer hours and making more money to build a bigger house, consider the alternative: gifting your partner and humanity with your brilliance.
The Relationship Dance
Sue Johnson, the world’s leading couples therapist and researcher talks about intimate relationship as a ‘dance that shapes and recreates the dancers’.
Relationship is about relating; ‘It’s a dance of synchrony requiring partners to improvise and tune in to each other’.
For entertainment we watch movies where brilliant actors talk and pick up each other’s flawless cues.
They respond perfectly. Dreamily. Lovingly. That’s why we pay them $20 million a picture, after all.
For Your Relationship Toolbox – Hold Me Tight by Dr. Sue Johnson
The books arrived!
And, we’re excited about gifting this extraordinary relationship tool to our scheduled clients during the month of May.
We’re doing this because we understand that when someone you love is stressed or overwhelmed, you want to help and may not know how.
A well-intentioned word or attempt to fix the problem can be misunderstood and then …
it’s downhill from there. If you and your partner get caught in a negative cycle, the argument can go on for hours….sometimes days. Its a painful way to live.
Enter, Hold Me Tight: Seven Conversations for a Lifetime of Love, 
a wonderful book that helps couples understand their negative cycle. It brings insight and logic to the world of emotions and supports your work with us.
Continue Reading For Your Relationship Toolbox – Hold Me Tight by Dr. Sue Johnson
