Couples Counseling Articles

autopilot

Space and Relationships

When I saw the NASA Webb images last month, I felt a deep sense of humility.

This new chapter of scientific exploration takes my breath away and some things came into focus….things I probably should have understood but didn’t.

Not really.

Here’s what became clear for me:

  • In the scheme of things, Earth is remarkably insignificant. (But it’s all we’ve got.)
  • In our own lives, we typically think of empty time and space as unproductive – something to be used or filled as quicky as possible.
  • By filling time and space to capacity, we lose sight of ourselves.
  • We’re on autopilot, busy and distracted.
  • On the rare occasion when we pause, we find it uncomfortable rather than delicious.

In fact, it can be unnerving and can affect our relationships deeply.

We search for something to say….something to do. Anything to avoid the emptiness.

What if, instead, we viewed empty time and space as a cauldron of creative potential…. something that deserves our attention.

Devotion.

Once we understand even the tiniest speck of emptiness contains pure potentiality…pure creativity… we could start to build a framework of value around emptiness.

It’s everywhere.

Emptiness allows us to make sense of words.

For example, there’s empty space between certain letters on the screen and….as we read, that emptiness gives birth to meaning.

Likewise, the space between musical notes and the pause between beautiful phrases allows us to enjoy a symphony or a love song.

The pure potential of empty time and space shows up in our relationships too.

Stillness reveals what’s inside us.

Sometimes, it’s spontaneous joy.

Other times unwelcome emotions and unspeakable thoughts bubble up. They launch us into behaviors we later regret.

Perhaps it’s equally important to explore our inner space.

Because when we turn away from emptiness, we turn away from co-creating our future.