Couples Counseling Articles

Self-Care Builds a Stronger, More Fulfilling Relationship

Wellness Counseling Center Self-Care

You work hard at your job, your health and your relationship.

Yet sometimes, despite all the effort, you feel you’ve only scratched the surface of where you want to be.

You know that a relationship is not one defined path. You have options.

It’s a choice you’ve made to be with someone (or not) as you walk this journey of a lifetime.

Most of us underestimate the link between our relationship and other aspects of our life.

Take self-care as an example.

Simply observe your approach toward self-care and you’ll see it mirrored in your relationship.

Hint: Best not to confuse self care with pampering or a night out with friends.

If you do, you’ll miss the importance and far-reaching implications.

Self-care means so much more.

Let’s take a moment to peel back the layers, and consider the intricate connection between our well-being and our relationships.

From Atoms to Awesome

We are made up of 7 octillion atoms…a staggering number.

That’s a 7 followed by 27 zeros and a lot of tiny pieces!

The human body is complex and composed of various elements, including oxygen, carbon, and nitrogen, which combine to form molecules, cells, tissues, and organs.

Those atoms and elements combine to form molecules, cells, tissues and organs, which collectively make up the human body.

That’s a lot to take care of…yet…most of the body is empty space.

A simple concept that’s wildly complex and might leave you wondering…

How do I care for my body and what resides in that space; Fear or Love?

Complexity Emerges from Simplicity

The body’s 38 trillion cells do best when they function harmoniously.

If they don’t, bad things will happen.

This starts out as a very simple idea and complexity emerges quickly.

In relationships, as in our personal well-being, we might misunderstand, misinterpret or ignore important cues.

We get distracted and overlook things that seem too complex or overwhelming.

We look the other way or tune things out.

Sometimes quickly…sometimes slowly…in our relationships and in our bodies…tension sets in…flow and ease become elusive.

What do you choose to not see?

The Remarkable Brain Will Trick Us

Over the millennia, humans learned to gather information, create stories and construct our daily lives around them.

The stories we created often fit a narrative originating in fear and survival.

They were largely untrue but they soothed us.

Sometimes the stories added to our confusion but we believed them anyway and rarely checked them out factually.

There’s an argument to be made that humans are the only species on earth with the ability to fabricate a counter-factual hypothetical future.

Even today, the stories we tell ourselves can be wildly counterproductive to our well-being and our relationships.

What stories do you spin and believe to be true?

Creating Harmony

At their most fundamental level, relationships and self-care are simple but not easy.

To thrive, we must succeed at the basics first.

Creating a sustainable path seems to make the journey easier.

It’s the stuff that makes dreams come true.

As for me, I follow and recommend a few simple yet powerful self-care concepts I believe to be foundational for an awesome life.

They show up differently for everyone. Yet, when implemented and working harmoniously, they unleash lovely levels of happiness.

And, yes, they appear super simple on the surface. But look again…

They require ridiculous levels of courage, vigilance and self-reflection along with a deep commitment to your personal well-being:

  • Quality sleep and ample rest
  • Nutrition and a clean diet
  • Movement and exercise
  • Love and connection
  • Purpose and meaningful work

Are you willing to make self-care your number ONE priority?